Babies Having Babies
It seems like every time I turn around there is another girl around 20 years old having a baby. Just this morning I found out that three of my childhood friends are pregnant. None of them are over the age of 22 and only one of them is married. Why do babies keep having babies?
As wonderful as having children is, it amazes me that so many young women would rather raise children during what I consider to be their youth, than enjoy the freedom of this time while it lasts. The 20s are supposed to be the years of independence. This is the age when one has more freedom from parents but also freedom from being strapped down to a spouse or children. Young mothers miss out on this time of freedom. I wonder how many mothers today in their 30s and 40s who had children around age 20 wish they had waited just a few more years.
I think this is truer for women who do not plan on having children at a young age. For the two of my friends who are not married, their pregnancies were not planned. One of these young women is living with her mother, while the other was impregnated by a 42 year old man who has been cheating on her. Thinking about stories such as these makes me sad, not only for the mothers but for the babies who will most likely grow-up in homes that are unstable.
What really frustrates me is that these unplanned pregnancies can be prevented. Even if a woman decides to have sexual intercourse, there are so many different options of birth control that unplanned pregnancies should not be as prevalent as they are. For the sake of the babies and the mothers, I wish young women would be more responsible and take actions to prevent unwanted pregnancy.
I often find it very upsetting when I learn of past friends getting pregnant at young ages, especially when they are unplanned. I believe that many young women are currently uneducated about birth control and the seriousness that comes along with unprotected sex. That is when female educators, like ourselves can help present this information to young women in our middle and high schools.
All of this young pregnancy, especially with the supposed rise of availability in not only contraceptives but contraceptive education, IS ridiculous. I have a 23-year old friend who is about 4 months pregnant with a “surprise” baby, too. In my Health, Healing and Culture Anthropology class, I am doing a paper on teenage pregnancy and why so many adolescent girls become young mothers. Turns out, after a lot of research, I found out that in some races (yes, in the United States!), bearing children is a sign of social status. Some girls are even getting pregnant intentionally for fear that they are sterile.
Periwinkle’s comments sound right on to me. Social status. Or PERCEIVED social status. When I taught high school students, I came upon a pregnant teen in the bathroom. She was stroking her very large belly and talking to another girl. Soon, the other girl interrupted and said, “OH, I want one, too. I want one so bad.” The scene still haunts me. I think young girls WANT and NEED love and acceptance (just like all other humans). They know that they can get in from a child. What child does not LOVE and ACCEPT and NEED a mother? The idealism of raising a child seems to bring any rational discernment to a complete hault. In fact, how many teenage mothers practice “rational discernment” or reflection on a daily basis? What can schools and teachers do to promote a healthy life, not just a “good education?” I think they can do a lot more than just sex ed. and “character education” seminars!